Toys for Tots
by Faux Fox
Summary: It's the must have item of the Christmas season. Too bad Bulma couldn't get one. So she sends a couple hapless Saiyans off to find some.


Disclaimer: I do not own Dragonball/Z/GT/Super

 _This story is unrelated to my other fics. It could be current universe or just slightly altered. fangurlsrule, this one is for you._

 **Toys for Tots**

Bulma pushed open the front door of Capsule Corp while juggling her cell phone and an armful of bags. Said door went slamming back into the wall with a bang. A mixture of irritation and anger crossed her face as she yelled into the phone. "I heard you the first time. What I'm telling you is that your stupid employees didn't hold them for me. I've now been all over West City trying to replace items that I had already paid for at _your_ store!"

There was a pause in her rant and she kicked the door back closed. "Oh I know I'd better be getting a refund. You are the ones who screwed up. Don't think you'll ever be getting my business again."

Dumping the bags in the hallway, Bulma rubbed at her temples. "Oh, you just now remembered how much I've been spending with you annually? Well maybe you can think about that loss while you figure out why my order was resold!"

She angrily hit end on the phone and flung it away to slide down the hall. Giving in she finally gave a scream of frustration. "AHHHHHHH!"

What had been a muffled background noise of shouts and banging further in the house ceased. Then the building shook slightly as a heavy door down the hall was smashed open.

Before she could register it, Bulma was roughly grabbed and shoved behind a muscular figure. She blinked up into the face of Vegeta who was searching the hall and nearby living room for the source of her distress.

From farther down the hall a voice called. "I don't see anyone in the kitchen and Mrs Briefs is ok."

Bulma turned to see Gohan standing protectively in front of her mother at the kitchen doorway. A gruff voice brought her attention back to Vegeta. "Well woman, what were you screaming about? The brat and I interrupted our training to come out here and save your ass."

Fighting the urge to roll her eyes, Bulma crossed her arms. "Right. Saiyans aren't masochists who just enjoy beating the shit out of each other. Sorry to interrupt your and Gohan's bonding time."

The Saiyan Prince let out a low growl as he leaned in towards her. "Woman..."

She gave in to the eye roll this time before putting a hand on his muscular chest and pushing him back. "It's that stupid store. They sold off my order that I had paid for months ago! I've been to or called every store in West City now and no one has anymore!"

Vegeta grabbed Bulma by the shoulders and shook her gently. "What are you babbling about now? Just point me in the right direction and I'll go exact some revenge for you on this pitiful human."

With a huff, Bulma pulled out of his arms. "Vegeta no! It won't help the situation. It's that toy that Trunks and Goten have been going on and on about for the last several months. I pre-ordered it just as soon as I could to make sure that they each had one for Christmas. Now I don't know what to do!"

Gohan flinched as her voice rose in volume. He warily made his way towards her. "Do you mean those silly action figures for that show they watch? The news at lunch said that they were sold out within half an hour of the shipments arriving in West City this morning."

Bulma glared at the boy, making him take a few steps back. "Don't you think I know that? Christmas is in two days. Do you know how those two boys are going to howl if they don't unwrap those toys? Satan City is supposed to get their shipment this afternoon, but I have an important client meeting in an hour that I can't reschedule or I'd already be halfway there already."

She narrowed her eyes at Gohan, causing him to raise his hands defensively. Then gave an evil smirk. "Gohan, you've been going to school for a few months now. With your playing superhero down there you should know your way around Satan City pretty well, right? You do know where the mall is don't you?"

He could only nod dumbly, he didn't like where she was going with this.

Bulma gave him a bright smile that was somehow more terrifying than her previous smirk. "Good. You can fly down there and pick up the toys. It's the _Alien Monkey Transformable Action Figures with Kung Fu Grip_ . Trunks wants the _Monkey King_ and Goten wants the _Monkey General_."

Laughter broke out from the half forgotten Saiyan behind Bulma. Vegeta's head was thrown back in his mirth. "Yes. Go fetch the toys, brat. Delivery boy is the perfect job for you."

Gohan scowled at Vegeta and took an aggressive step forward. "Hey! I never asked to be called that!"

Bulma stepped between them and gave them both a look that dared them to cross her. "I wouldn't laugh if I were you, Vegeta. You're going with him. Gohan isn't aggressive enough to deal with the holiday crowds and I wan't those toys. Gohan can keep you from actually killing anyone."

All laughter left Vegeta as he crossed his arms and dug his heals in stubbornly. "I refuse to lower myself to such a menial task."

Bulma got right up in his face and stared him in the eyes. "Well Mr Without-a-gravity-room, you better do it or I'll make sure you don't have any training facilities for a month for every minute those two boys spend crying on Christmas day."

Vegeta was the first to look away. "You wouldn't dare."

Bulma let out a harrumph. "Just try me."

Letting his arms drop, Vegeta gave a grunt and moved towards the door. "Fine. But there had better be a reward for me for doing this. Hurry up brat! We can get in another training session before dinner if we're quick."

Quickly rummaging through her purse, Bulma pulled out a credit card and waved it at Gohan. He swiftly tucked it inside his blue gi.

"Wait just a moment." She dashed into the kitchen and retrieved the two phones that had been abandoned on the counter. Bulma shook her head at them as she set up the programs. "I don't see why you two don't like carrying these around. They are so useful. Here, I set up an application to let you know if any nearby stores suddenly get the toys in stock."

The males grudgingly took the devices. Gohan slipped it in next to the credit card and Vegeta tucked his into his armor.

Bulma patted both of them on the arms. "I'm so glad you two are doing this. Now remember, get those toys. If you don't I'm not going to feed either of you for a week."

Eyes wide at the threat, both males nodded and hurried out the door.

 **o-o-o-o-o**

Flaring up to Super Saiyan, the two warriors raced from West City to Satan City. Powering down, they landed in the center of the Orange Star Mall parking lot, which was about as inconspicuous as Vegeta was willing to get.

Gohan rubbed the back of his head nervously as the crowds of people outside stared at the two men who had just dropped in from the sky. He tried to stammer an explanation. "Um, we're just trying out some prototype shoes that..."

He was abruptly cut off by an elbow to the solar plexus. Vegeta grabbed the front of his gi and dragged him towards the mall entrance. "Quit making up excuses for these sheep. We don't have time for this."

The doors automatically opened and the two Saiyans stepped inside. Instantly they began choking and covered their noses as they were assaulted by the scent of unwashed and over perfumed humanity.

Gohan gagged, trying to breath through his mouth. "This is worse than the high school, and that place stinks."

Vegeta took several shallow breaths before steeling resolve. Standing up straighter he marched forward. "Come on brat. A true warrior can overcome anything. Including such a vile attack to our acute sense of smell."

Staggering after him, Gohan kept his wrist band in front of his nose to ward off the stench.

Senses already overwhelmed, neither noticed the life size poster of a afro haired man posing at the right side of the entrance. It proudly proclaimed its message in gaudy coloring. "Meet the world savior himself, Hercule Satan! Today only in the central mall food court by Santa!"

 **o-o-o-o-o**

After several wrong turns and doubling back to the mall directory twice, the two Saiyans made their way to the next toy store on the list.

The mall was very crowded with several people taking apparent pleasure in blocking the corridors and walkways. Not a good thing to attempt with an already short tempered Saiyan. Vegeta tolerated it for about three seconds as Gohan tried to politely ask people to move. Then he stomped past the teenager and started gently shoving those impeding movement out of the way. Well as gently as he was going to bother, which meant most of them went flying off and into the walls on either side.

A red faced Gohan apologized profusely as the scrambled after the Prince before the space was filled in again with people. "Vegeta! We can't just go throwing people around!"

"You worry too much, brat. I haven't killed any of them yet." Vegeta kept up his single minded march with the occasional slight pause to remove any human obstacles from his path.

Soon the hallway and kiosks gave way to the open area of the central court. Well normally open area. Right now it was packed with humanity crowding around a figure off to one side.

Gohan's stomach picked this moment to growl loudly in protest. Blushing the teen rubbed the back of his head. "Hehe, oops."

Stopping, Vegeta quirked an eyebrow at the boy. "Go get something to eat. A hungry Saiyan is never at their best. I'll go check out this store."

Thinking only with his stomach, the teen grinned foolishly at the Prince before hurrying off. "Alright, thanks Vegeta! I'll only be a moment."

It was only a few minutes later as he was downing his snack from MegaBurger, that Gohan's mind kicked in and told him that leaving a homicidal Saiyan unsupervised in a very crowded mall was probably a bad idea. He quickly stuffed the last two hamburgers into his mouth as he heard the first scream.

Dashing out of the way of prying eyes and into a maintenance hall, Gohan quickly pressed the buttons on his watch and transformed into his superhero persona.

 **o-o-o-o-o**

With a shake of his head, Vegeta had watched the boy rush off. Then he turned and began bulldozing his way through the crowd to the other side of the court. Shouts of dismay and cries of pain followed in his wake.

He had nearly made it to the other side when the crowd suddenly cleared a wide circle around him and a short girl with black pigtails stood in his way. Placing her hands on her hips she did her best to glare him down. "As deputy for the Satan City Police, I, Videl, demand that you stop right there mister! You can just go around hurting people. I'm placing you under arrest."

Vegeta scoffed and moved forward through the now nicely open space. "Get out of my way little girl. I don't have time for you."

Videl pulled back her leg and swung it at the Saiyan. He calmly reached up and grabbed ahold of her foot, holding it up and keeping her off balance.

Leaping with her other leg, Videl tried to strike with it, only to find herself flying through the air to land in an unceremonious heap and skidding a ways across the floor. Several people screamed at seeing the 'second strongest' person in the world defeated so easily.

At seeing the man disobey his daughter, then toss her away like a used tissue, a large hairy man stepped up in front of the Prince to throw his ego around. "Hey! How dare you do that to my daughter. I'm going to teach you a lesson or my name isn't Hercule Satan!"

The afro haired man charged forward. "Megaton Punch!"

Feeling a headache coming on, Vegeta rubbed at his temples. He reached out and grabbed Satan's fist and squeezed, forcing the man to his knees.

Mr Satan looked around at the crowd of bystanders nervously. He was worried that if they him weak, they'd quit making him filthy rich and famous. With false bravado he looked up at the person still gripping his hand. "Ahaha! Is that all you've got, pipsqueak? I could take you down in my sleep..."

His words were cut off as a foot landed in his gut.

Vegeta sneered down at the gasping wrestler before releasing his hand. "You couldn't take out a dead rabbit. Unlike Cell I don't have a soft spot for fools and you've just given me the perfect opportunity to finish you off."

The Saiyan cackled evilly as he stepped back and gather his ki in his hand.

Oo's and Ah's came from the crowd as the Prince felt a familiar power land beside him. Knowing where this was going, he groaned and ignored the flamboyant figure he could see out of the corner of his eye.

Executing a perfect imitation of one of Racoome's poses, the Great Saiyaman stepped up to save the day. "Stop right there you fiend! It is unjust to attack a helpless opponent!"

Vegeta gave a snort, ignoring Gohan, and released his blast at the wide eyed Satan. Videl who had struggled to her feet, threw herself in front of her father. She watched as death approached.

Suddenly a red cape appeared in front of the two and swatted the offending blast into the ceiling, giving the mall a brand new, unwanted, skylight.

Gohan, forgetting that he was currently Saiyaman, stomped over to the now snickering Saiyan. "You can't just go firing off ki blasts in the mall! We're going to get in so much trouble. I don't want to starve to death!"

Videl, who had begun smirking in victory at Saiyaman's appearance, now looked on in confusion. Saiyaman was acting like he knew this mad man.

Vegeta looked at the boy in front of him in disgust. "Tsk. Playing the fool and hiding your true self. A true warrior wouldn't dress like a clown. But then you are your father's son so I guess you can't help it."

Ignoring the teen's sputtering of anger, the Prince moved swiftly and ripped the watch off of Gohan's wrist, causing the superhero guise to dissipate. Crushing the device, he looked at the now shocked boy. "I don't know why the woman made you this stupid costume anyway."

Videl stood there gobsmacked as the bane of her existence turned into her naive classmate. All she could think of was pounding his stupid head in for lying to her.

Mr Satan had made his way back to his feet and stepped forward to confront the two in front of him. "Hey now! We don't need any of your tricks here! So just take your mirrors and go home!"

Vegeta's head snapped towards the man. He smacked Gohan out of the way before he could interfere. Launching himself several feet into the air he ascended into Super Saiyan. Staring down at the suddenly terrified Satan, he prepared an energy attack again. "I'll teach you some 'tricks' you buffoon!"

Recovering from Vegeta's hit, Gohan groaned and did the only thing he could to possibly spare lives. Blasting into Super Saiyan himself, he attacked Vegeta. Energy dissipated as the two exchanged blows in midair.

As the warriors paused to glare at each other, whimpering sounds reached their ears. They both turned and looked down.

There, curled into a fetal position on the ground was the great Hercule Satan. Looking up he begged pitifully at what he saw as his own personal gods of vengeance. "I'm so sorry! Please don't kill me! I didn't mean to steal your credit for killing Cell! I just wanted all the fame and money!"

Dead silence rang throughout the court and over the crowd. None could believe what they were hearing. Many eyes stared blankly at the phones they were holding up to record the action. All with the same thought running through their heads. _I'm going to get famous selling this video!_

In the air, gold hair faded back to black and the two Saiyans descended to the ground. Vegeta smirked as he kicked the bawling man on the ground. "Look brat, he's finally apologizing."

Gohan looked ready to pull his hair out. Before he could think of something to say, beeping rang throughout the silence. Both Saiyans pulled out the hated cell phones. Faster on the draw, Gohan opened up the notification. "Alright! **We-Got-Toys** just got their shipment in! It's that way."

Vegeta gave a nod as Gohan waved towards the right. Both flashed to Super Saiyan and flew down the hall, over the shocked people's heads.

Videl stared dumbfounded after the Saiyans for a moment before turning her attention back to her still crying father. Grabbing him by the shirt, she forced him to look at her. He gulped as she glared at him. "You better start explaining, Daddy."

 **o-o-o-o-o**

With trepidation, the two Saiyans quietly made their way into Capsule Corp. Cradling their precious cargo, they followed the sound of the television into the living room to find a fuming Bulma watching the nightly news. Vegeta carefully laid the toys on the couch next to his blue haired wife. "Here woman. We got the damn toys. Don't ever ask us to do that again."

Bulma jumped up off the couch and gave the both of them a glare. "Oh believe me, I won't."

Neither was expecting the large pipe wrench that smacked them both in the head. Bulma's voice grew louder as she pointed the tool at the television. "I sent you both on a simple errand. You managed to destroy part of the mall, reveal your powers to everyone, and make the world news."

Placing her hands on her hips, she contemplated hitting them again. "I'd starve you both if not for the fact several dozen witnesses recorded that oaf Hercule cowering on the floor and begging you not to kill him for stealing the credit for Cell's death. The news has been repeating that clip every ten minutes. The amusement from that _almost_ makes up for what you two did. So no gravity room for two weeks, _but_ if you're good during that time, I might make some upgrades to it."

The two Saiyans nodded their heads glumly in acceptance.


End file.
